I am writing this aboard a frieght train, trying to go north so that I can provide for you. Jumping the train is dangerous, and so many died, falling off the train or not making the jump at all and all getting sucked beneath the hungry wheels. There were children too, and I cried as I imagined you, my children, coming to find me and dying, or living, like the two children beside me. Miguel and Elena are traveling north to find their parents who left years ago in search of work. I have taken them in, saved them, because they remind me too much of you. Elena is so much like Magdelena, you could be sisters and Miguel is very much like you, Eduardo my brave son, who wanted to come with me. They don't know anything about how dangerous this is. I keep watch but I feel myself tiring. Sometimes Miguel looks at me with a firey anger in his eyes I know isn't meant for me. It is his father he sees in me who left him behind. I sit up and watch these children and the moon as the train rumbles forward towards the north, and away from what I hate most to leave. I wonder if one day you will hate me too for what I have done, and am doing, right now.